Optimism vs Pessimism

They say perception is reality and I have to agree. The world is exactly as you view it...mostly. I'm not going to try to turn this into one of those motivational, self-help kind of rants, just offer my opinion.

I just got done having a discussion with a friend of mine who is kind of in a down mood. After talking for a while, she stated that I was entirely too optimistic, in which case, I pointed out that perhaps she was too pessimistic.

After telling her "Sometimes you just have to believe that the world is going to help you out," she pointed out that she could not believe she was hearing this from me because, as she puts it, I am "usually very negative." I can't argue with that, but I revealed to her that when I do get into these negative moods, the simple idea that the world isn't out to get me and that God will take care of me, I usually feel a lot better. She's an atheist so, needless to say, that didn't really help.

But religion, in this discussion, is mostly irrelevant. My point is, the world is what you make it. If you sit around constantly focusing on the negative aspects of your life, you're going to find more and more things to be negative about. And it has taken me a long time to learn that.

I've been trying to occupy my time with things that make me most happy as of late. Simple things really; reading, writing, music, family, and friends. That has allowed me to not stress over the bad things going on recently in my life. Notice, I'm not dismissing these things, merely not worrying about them. As a good friend told me recently, you can only overcome one obstacle at a time, and when an obstacle appears, I'll deal with it when the time is right and until then, I'll focus on the good things.

Calling A Mulligun

"Remember that we become those who we die for, carrying their guilt on our shoulders, only having a life lost in the heat of innocent bravery. We are our loved ones heroes, and they won't even notice. They can't. That's the beauty of it, I guess."

For those of you who don't know, my father runs the Coca-Cola Scholarship Foundation. That means that every year, they give away 250 scholarships to high school seniors around the country. There are 200 $10,000 scholarships and 50 $20,000 scholarships, so that equals $3 million a year in scholarships.

The kids who get these scholarships are not just your regular everyday students. The people getting these scholarships are the ones making straight A's through high school. Lots of kids make straight A's though, so what else is to it? These kids are also the ones putting hundreds of hours into charity work each year. These are the kids who are captains of sports teams, presidents of student government, working 2 jobs to take care of their younger siblings because their parents aren't able to. These kids are heroes and inspirations.

It's around this time each year when my dad brings home 250 folders to look over and I like to look at them when I get the chance and I'm always amazed at what I read.

A few years ago, I attended the scholar's final night in Atlanta and was talking to this guy my age from Dallas who had received one of the $20,000 scholarships. We were just talking normal guy stuff, sports, music, girls, etc. With the night growing to an end, he said to me, "Man, you can't begin to understand how much this means to me. Not just the scholarship, but your dad has been the closest thing to a father figure I have ever had. He's only known me a few days and he's already offered to help me with anything I ever need. I hope you know how lucky you are to have him as your dad."

That stuck with me for a long time and recently it finally crashed down on top of me. I've never lived up to what I should be. I'm a smart guy, I love learning but I hate actually trying in school so I don't do as well as I should. In my heart, I love helping people, but I tend to shut people out and push them away because I'm scared. I guess I've just always been afraid of failing so I never really tried because if you never start something, you can't be expected to finish.

Well, that's going to change from now on. I've made a lot of enemies in my life and I don't have room for anymore. I do have a lot more room for friends though. So, it's time to start acting more like the man I should have already become. I want to do better in school, I want to be happy, but most of all I want to make others smile. No more chasing women, no more drinking myself into a stupor multiple times a week, no more begging God to give me things. From now on, it's whatever He wants me to receive. Wish me luck.

Stuff I've Learned Along the Way

So, as I was sitting around the family today, listening to old stories and the like, I came to the conclusion that nearly everything I have learned in life that matters, I have learned from my family and close friends. While there is no substitute for a formal education, you can't really learn to live your life in a classroom. With that being said, I've decided to present to you, the important things I have learned so far in life:

• There are two types of trouble. One is the trouble you knowingly walk into, the other is trouble that just happens...it's important to know the difference.


• You can get by on charm for about 15 minutes, after that, you had better know something.


• Foul language is a sign of a limited vocabulary. (Gotta work on that one)


• It's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and standing up for what you believe.


• There's a difference between an excuse and a reason.


• People deserve a second chance, sometimes a third, but never a fourth.


• If a woman perceives it, she's right. (Compliments of the former Colonel, now General)


• Don't trust people who are cruel to dogs.


• If you don't know what to do, it's probably a good time to ask for help.


• Go with your gut, but always have a back up plan.


• Do crazy, don't do stupid. Know the difference.


• Know when to keep your mouth shut. (Especially when women are involved)


• Actions don't always speak louder than words.


• Know when to quit.


• Sometimes you have a right to be angry, but never cruel. Know when, and how, to apologize.


• It's better to give and go without.


• Always stand up straight. (I don't really know why but I had my grandma yell it at me enough to take it to heart.)


• People think better of you when you have manners. Guys, hold doors and give up your seats for ladies.


• Respect your elders, at some point in time, they were exactly where you are.


• The 7 P's - Proper Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance.


• If you lay down with dogs, you rise up with fleas.


• You're going to make mistakes. You can't prevent mistakes and you can't change them, you've just got to learn from them.